When I say I like frozen food, I’m referring to the nuggets and burger patties that I can take out from the freezer. Not chole and parathe that’s been cooked by mom a week ago and freeze packed for me to survive on as she was going out of town for a fortnight.

Yes, chole and parathe made by mom are always nice (read: ghar ka khana). But that equation’s complete only when served by her as well.

Food groups for those studying science might be according to their nutrients. But for me, they’re according to different phases and moods in life – kid, bachelor, homely, happy, sad – those types. Frozen food, in general, falls under the bachelor category. And taking out the lunch/dinner out of the freezer and warming it up on the gas – that feeling of satisfaction is complete without involving your mother in the process of getting the food to the table. That’s how I like my frozen food. Covered with bread crumbs. Deep fried. Fattening. Crisp.

Talking of crisp, if you take a paratha out of the freezer and try warming it up instantly so that you could make a “fried potatoes with skin and garlic mayonnaise paratha roll”, then beware. What you’ll get is something more closer to a taco.

PS: The above image is an actual representation of my freezer. The packets have been conveniently labelled with the dish names by mom.

Yes, I know what you’re thinking. Being a food reviewer how could I haven’t eaten at Terttulia yet. After today, I think I’m glad I hadn’t gone there yet. But quite a few people I know rave about the place. Here’s what went wrong:

• The place smelled of fresh paint. No, you do not keep a restaurant open when it smells like that. Do you not have the money to buy some air freshener? Or at the least have the host go over to the tables apologize for the same on their own?
• The hosts were lost in their own world. Received and seated half of the guests only. Some, like me, went and seated themselves. They were also no where to be seen when the order was to be placed or the bill to be paid.
• Either have both the glasses on the table (since I was sitting at a table for 2) or neither. The waiter asked me if I’d like bottled or regular water. It took him 10 minutes to serve water then.
• The menu says “Please check our blackboard for the daily specials”. My view of the blackboard was blocked by a wine rack. So to check that, I’ll have to leave my seat. For some, there’s no view of the blackboard at all.
• The grilled/toasted ‘Our Hero’ sandwich (ham, bacon, cheese & cranberry sauce) wasn’t crisp enough by the time it reached the table. And there was no inkling of cranberry sauce at all. This disappointment costed me Rs 285. Should’ve probably just ordered the Beef Cheesesteak baguette.
• During my 30-45 mins at the restaurant, the music on the speakers must’ve changed genres a gazillion times. The decor is all over the place. In short, an identity crisis. The outside seating area is at least consistent in its look and feel.
• And again, everyone on the staff is lost in their own world.

So, do they deserve a second chance?

Terttulia
Corner of Lane 5
South Main Road
Koregaon Park